|
BEST
OF ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT:
Best
Museum
 |
| Doorway
to the daring..
Photo byAndrea Fischman. |
Tang
Teaching Museum and Art Gallery at Skidmore College
815
N. Broadway, Saratoga Springs
At first, it was uncertain whether any of the exhibits mounted
within the Tang would generate the same controversy and conversation
that its exterior did. Architect Antoine Predock’s design
generated galvanic and bitterly opposed points of view—and
we’re happy to say that director Charles Stainback and curator
Ian Berry have lived up to the Tang’s subtle audacity. The
most recent exhibit, From Pop to Now, was a marvelous
tour through the post-abstract-expressionism art world, proving
that the Tang can present an accessible survey-style show
without being bland, and earlier thematic exhibitions such
as Picturing the Indian: the Politics of Representation,
which juxtaposed dated and stereotypical images of the American
Indian with new work made by Native Americans, made clear
that the museum could tackle political issues without giving
short shrift to aesthetic concerns. The Tang is a first-rate
and daring fine-arts museum right here in our own backyard.
^top
Best
Movie Theater
Spectrum 7 Theatres
290
Delaware Ave., Albany
Still the best little multiplex around, booking the widest
variety of movies. With its flexible scheduling, the Spectrum
gives foreign and independent films the chance to find an
audience. And don’t forget its upscale snack bar, with specialty
treats alongside the traditional candies and popcorn.
^top
Best
Second-Run Movie Theater
Proctor’s Theater
432 State St., Schenectady
Whoever came up with the designation “movie palace” must have
seen a flick at this opulent vaudeville hall from the Roaring
’20s. Now it’s 2002, and Proctor’s still presents movies in
a style—and at a price—befitting the Golden Age of Hollywood.
The vast screen and its gilded surroundings do have a couple
of modern flourishes, such as digital sound and AC. But the
$2 admission ($3 balcony seating) to this perennial winner
remains unchanged by time, and a box of popcorn (yes, an old-fashioned
red-and-white box, not a plastic tub soaked in yellow oleo)
will set you back less than a buck. Proctor’s also gets kudos
for its charming arcade, which is lined with window displays
from local museums instead of ear-splitting play stations.
^top
Best
Family-Affordable First-Run Movie Theater
Crandell Theater
Main
Street, Chatham
OK, often it’s “tail end of the first run,” but who’s complaining
at $3.50 for adults, $2.50 for kids and a buck for popcorn?
This family-owned cinema has been around since the ’30s and
still offers that pre-war, small-town movie experience, complete
with generous screen, high ceiling and really uncomfortable
seats.
^top
Best
Film Series
Time & Space Limited
Columbia Street, Hudson
There are a number of worthy film programs in the region,
but TSL has the most consistently innovative programming.
It hosts intriguing events with filmmakers, and there’s a
unique spirit of community associated with it. Gotta love
that funky industrial space, too.
^top
Best
Equity Theater
(Big Operation)
Williamstown Theatre Festival
Williamstown, Mass.
The WTF deservedly won this year’s Tony for best regional
theater. With a roster of actors, directors and designers
that comprises a virtual Who’s Who of American theater,
the WTF continues to bring top production values to a heady
blend of new and traditional works, a notable number of which
have gone on to the tough proving ground of Broadway. With
a history of having such major playwrights as Tennessee Williams
and Arthur Miller in residence, the WTF is an important home
to creative theater artists.
^top
Best
Equity Theater (Adventurous)
Stageworks
Kinderhook
While other local Equity houses are playing it close to subscribers’
vests, plying the area with safe choices that risk nothing
and explore nothing, Stageworks boldly goes where no one else
does.
^top
Best
Theater (Defunct)
Proctor’s Too
Schenectady
Always excellent, always risky, Proctor’s Too is missed by
everyone who loves performance. No one else in the area offered
so much so strangely so infrequently, and now it’s gone.
^top
Best
Community Theater Venue
Steamer No. 10
500 Western Ave., Albany
Where else can you see original children’s theater, French
performance dance/art, original plays by teenagers, folk music,
recent off-Broadway plays, improv, puppet shows, Shakespeare
and sketch comedy—and get fresh popcorn and have the safest
parking in Albany (a police substation is attached to the
theater)?
^top
Best
Actor
David Bunce
A NYSTI stalwart, Bunce recently has branched out from the
usual hale, happy fellow, bringing some edge to the whimsical
smile.
^top
Best
Educational Theater
New York State Theater Institute
Troy
Berkshire Theatre Festival
Stockbridge,
Mass.
(Tie)
NYSTI exists to create theater for young audiences, and there
are probably few organizations in the country with its sense
of purpose and genuine commitment. Its original musical productions,
which began with A Tale of Cinderella, are gravy. But
the BTF’s education program is growing remarkably successfully
and is also marked by sincerity, talent and, most important,
respect for its young audiences and participants.
^top
Best
Theater Venue
Adams Memorial Theatre, Williamstown Theatre
Festival
Williamstown,
Mass.
One enters beneath its lofty columns and one senses not only
the rich history of this venue but also the grand tradition
and historical sweep of Western theater. This wonderful edifice
will soon fall as a new performing arts complex engulfs it.
One can only hope that the ugly new exterior will contain
an auditorium of the present AMT’s warmth, comfort, clear
sightlines and balance between intimacy and grandness.
^top
Best
Director
Nicholas Martin
Martin has flexed his muscles in a variety of productions
that have run the gamut from Hedda Gabler (which went
on to fame on Broadway) to the present success of his irresistible
Where’s Charley?, which is sure to have a life beyond
the two weeks that it graced the stage in Williamstown. Best
at rediscovering forgotten gems, Martin directs with honesty
and an obvious—and contagious—love of his material and actors.
^top
Best
Arts Venue (With Puppets and Drag Queens)
Hudson River Theater
521 Warren St., Hudson
Behind an attractive but unassuming facade on Hudson’s Warren
Street, the impossibly voluptuous Musty Chiffon (who in non-drag
life is Dini LaMot, formerly of the band Human Sexual Response)
has lit a powder keg of cabaret. On any given night, the lovingly
refurbished 100-seat theater hosts the likes of Kate Pierson
of the B-52’s, Maggie Moore of Hedwig and the Angry Inch
and Carol Channing impersonator Richard Skipper. And that’s
not the half of it: The theater also boasts puppet shows,
movie nights, drag shows and a full bar. As if booze and puppets
weren’t enough in and of themselves.
^top
Best
Dance Venue
Jacob’s Pillow
358 George Carter Road, Becket, Mass.
In a walk, a kick, a strut. The Ted Shawn Theatre was built
for dance, so every seat is good. The Doris Duke Studio Theatre
provides a frame for younger companies and more experimental
dance. The admission-free Inside/Out Stage has become an entrée
to dance for kids, old folks and everyone. The Pillow also
hosts a myriad of free events—talks, exhibitions, dance classes
and parties—almost every day, welcoming audiences even when
they don’t have tickets to the evening’s performance.
^top
Best
Dance Company
Ellen Sinopoli Dance Company
The most experimental game in town for site-specific dances
and inventive collaborations with artists of other disciplines.
Now in its 10th year, the company has attracted some smooth,
interesting dancers who look good together. As a troupe, it’s
never stopped growing.
^top
Best
Unintended Result of the Pampering of Dancers
The women’s bathroom of the National Museum
of Dance
99
S. Broadway, Saratoga Springs
Alison Moore, the museum’s first artistic director, ordered
john seats that curve upward at the back to support dancers’
spines. What’s good for dancers is good for everyone. The
lounge is furnished with a comfy-cushioned wicker armchair,
lacy curtains and a watercolor poster of the amazing Loie
Fuller (1862-1928) floating off the ground, buoyed upward
on sails of flowing, colored silks.
^top
Best
Performance Venue
The Egg
Empire
State Plaza, Albany
That concrete salad container that hovers over the Plaza has
an elegant, intimate surprise inside: a performance theater.
Two of ’em, actually, but we especially like the larger Hart
theater: at approximately 900 seats, tiered for optimal visibility,
it fills the midsize-venue niche perfectly. And what a niche
that is when scheduled with the élan that the Egg demonstrates
on a regular basis. Take this season, for instance: Youssou
N’Dour and Gilbert and Sullivan, classical tabla and Hot Tuna,
modern-dance divinities galore, imaginative kids’ shows out
the wazoo, stagings direct from Broadway, opera, world music
and the Empire State Film Festival to boot. And no, it won’t
tip over.
^top
Best
Outdoor Venue
Agnes Macdonald Music Haven
Central
Park, Schenectady
Granted, Schenectady isn’t the Berkshires, but the rolling
hills of Central Park stand in rather nicely, and the Music
Haven stage faces a hill that happens to be perfectly graduated
for both terrific visibility and balmy breezes. But it’s the
combination of venue and scheduling that makes the Music Haven
a destination second to none. Its Second Wind summer concert
series sets the park afire with the hottest acts in folk,
blues, jazz and world music. And it’s free—you can’t say that
about the other green-space stages.
^top
Best
Booked Venue
Valentine’s
17 New Scotland Ave., Albany
Mike Watt, the Young Fresh Fellows, Chuck Prophet, the Asylum
Street Spankers, Jonathan Richman, Grant Hart, Steve Wynn
(playing the entire Days of Wine and Roses album, no
less), Cobre Verde, Rival Schools, Johnny Dowd, Mark Mulcahy,
David J, Guided by Voices, not to mention a whole slew of
local talent . . . we could go on and on, and we hope that
Valentine’s does. Bitch as we may about the dearth of midsize
clubs in the region, when we take a moment to think about
the big names, the cult-hero names and the Magnet-magazine-
profile names that Howard Glassman and company have brought
through our humble burg, we’re forced to admit we sound spoiled
and ungrateful.
^top
Best
Eclectic Club Booking
Club Helsinki
Great Barrington, Mass.
Whether showcasing legendary national acts or taking chances
on newcomers, no area club is more committed to diversity
than Great Barrington’s Club Helsinki. Name a form of modern
music, and Helsinki’s booked it—from zydeco to reggae, klezmer
to African, jazz to rock, bluegrass to blues. International
performers regularly make the trek to this little club in
the Berkshires—you may see Senegalese hiphop one night and
Australian folk the next. The decor and clientele—also motley
assortments—are worth checking out as well.
^top
Best
Place to See a Show
Troy
Where should you go when you just want to head out the door
without being a slave to the listings in the paper? Troy.
Where are you sure to find some great acts—rock & roll,
blues, garage, country swing, what have you? Troy. More specifically,
we’re talking about the Ale House and Artie’s Lansingburgh
Station. Not only do both of these clubs consistently book
great out-of-town and local music, they’re both great places
to be (and the Ale House has some of the best chicken wings
in town). The Troy crowd is nearly devoid of stiff little
hipsters, and people are actually nice to one another. Don’t
be afraid when your barstool neighbor leans over to start
a conversation: it’s the way of the Troy folk. And their drunkenness
doesn’t seem to be the angry sort; they like to have fun.
Shit, the Lawn Sausages are from Troy (and a co-front-Sausage
owns Artie’s). Any audience that’ll cheer and dance to a man
in a Spandex glitter bodysuit is OK in our book.
^top
Best
Band
Wetwerks
 |
| Breakout
beatmasters: Wetwerks.
Photo byJoe Putrock |
We’d
tell you that Wetwerks are truly at the top of their game
right now—except that we see potential for even further growth
and development, and we don’t want to sell that potential
short. Wetwerks have exploded onto the regional musical collective
consciousness over the past year with their over-the-top live
performances, and the three sharp new songs they recently
recorded with Filter knob-wiggler Rae DiLeo have got “hit”
written all over them.
^top
Best
Live Band
Small Axe
Nobody does it better than Small Axe, who continue to amaze
on the concert stage, pulling transcendence out of the heaviest
and most technically proficient stoner-flavored rock we’ve
ever encountered in these parts—or parts beyond. A great collection
of songs delivered like a Mack truck grille to the sternum,
brakes be damned.
^top
Best
Punk Band
The Erotics
We’re probably selling Mike Trash and company short by labeling
the Erotics “punk,” since they incorporate elements of glam
and guerrilla art into their excellent onstage adventures
as well. But hey, nobody else does the punky stuff better
than they do, so let’s just keep it simple and (po)go along
for the ride, whatever we (or you) (or they) call it.
^top
Best
Rock & Roll Band
Rocky Velvet
Each year Rocky Velvet get something in this issue, and each
year they get even better—so we must continue to acknowledge
this under various headings: retro, rockabilly, this year
it’s rock & roll (like it oughta be, like it used to be).
They’ve done away with the matching bowling shirts, yes, but
Rocky Velvet have matured into one of the best damn bands
in the area. Graham Tichy is no longer a “budding guitar hero,”
as we wrote in their Best Of entry in 2001. He’s a full-on
guitar hero, and a busy one at that—Tichy also plays with
our area’s grand pooh-bahs of rockabilly, the Lustre Kings,
and Detroit band Bones Maki & the Sun Dodgers. Ian Carlton
has the credentials to teach Frontman 101 to area college
students, as he’s one of our area’s best—struttin’, shakin’
and singin’ his pompadoured heart out—with the pipes to back
it up. And rhythm section Jay Gorleski (electric and double
bass) and Jeff Michael (drums) hold the bottom end like there’s
no tomorrow.
^top
Best
Roots Rock
Coal Palace Kings
Another band who just keep getting better. CPK’s current lineup
is phenomenal, and they’ve been playing all over our little
slice of the country to rave reviews, but unfortunately it
has been messed with as of late. Gone is George Lipscomb,
who provided much of the band’s rock with his chugging, pounding,
spot-fucking-on drumming. With the band being drummerless
(or, shall we say, Lipscombless) as we go to press, it’s hard
to see where they’ll go from here. But here’s hoping that
frontman Howard Glassman keeps writing his heartfelt gems
of the lonesome-range variety; that bassist Jeff Sohn and
guitarist Larry Winchester continue to add their own nuggets
of joy—er, sorrow—to the songwriting mix; that Winchester’s
guitar sound continues to make our hearts skip a beat; that
Sohn keeps holding up his end of the rhythm section like a
pro; and that Rick Morse maintains his pedal steel mastery.
^top
Best
Garage Band
Thee Ummmm . . .
We’re not sure of the exact spelling of Albany’s newest and
greatest garage band, Thee Ummm . . . , but we’re sure that
we just love ’em. Playing garage songs with wild abandon,
the band are helmed by Rocky Velvet frontlad Ian Carlton,
who gets sounds out of his Strat that’ll pierce your ears
(in a good way). Another Rocky Velvet member, bassist Jay
Gorleski, makes the team, and a couple of members of the sorely
missed 1313 Mockingbird Lane round out the band: Kim 13, coaxing
out pure vintage sounds on her Vox organ, and Brian Goodman,
who also pounded skins for Susan & the Surftones and sings
a good portion of this band’s songs, on drums. Watch this
band. They’ll soon be your favorite.
^top
Best-Kept
Secret
Super 400
Another band who jump categories every year but who we’ve
just gotta mention, we love ’em so much. Super 400’s hard-rock
psychedelic sound can give you flashbacks all by itself, and
the three musicians who make up the band are phenomenal musicians:
Guitarist-songwriter Kenny Hohman must have been born with
a guitar in his hand, bassist Lori Friday can lay down a groove
in her sleep, and drummer Joe Daley has music flowing through
his veins. So why “best-kept secret”? Because we just don’t
know where to catch them. We’ll hear rumors of shows in the
area, but they’re always hard to track down. Our quest is
made more difficult by the many bands the musicians play with—we
just don’t know them all. Sometimes they back Chris Busone,
a couple of them played in Gypsy Soul. And since the band
can improvise with the best of them, an impromptu Super 400
show can spring up at the drop of a hat. Can someone out there
start a Super 400 show hotline?
^top
Best
Vocalist
Mitch Elrod
He
gives us the shivers.
^top
Best
Band We Don’t Have to Kick Around Anymore
Crabapple
Now that Don Bazley has moved to Ithaca, it seems that Crabapple
may be no longer. Just when we were going to give them a Best
Of.
^top
Best
Big Band
Joey Thomas Big Band
We can’t figure out how the members of the Joey Thomas Big
Band can make any money on a gig. Once the cash is divided
among the 200 members, there can’t be much to go around. But
they play big-band jazz that’ll transport you to the ballrooms
of the ’30s, so we don’t really care how they do it.
^top
Best
Resurrection
China White
Albany’s metal gods, China White, have been at it since the
dawn of time. Their playing schedule goes in bits and spurts,
but it never sputters out—thank fucking God—and you never
know when you might get a new album from them (rumor has it
that there’s one planned pretty soon). Just when you say to
your Pabst-swilling neighbor, “Hey, where the hell have China
White been?” is when they’ll play a gig. So keep asking.
^top
Best
Karaoke
Ginger’s Ten-Ten Lounge
State
Street, Schenectady
Karaoke is king at Ginger’s Ten-Ten Lounge, and if you’re
like some of us, walking through the front door is like going
home again. It’s 1970s Christmas all the time: Festive strings
of lights hang in the dim air, and the dark walls are filled
with images of a family’s important events. Everyone is a
star at Ginger’s, and there are some ace singers among the
regulars—a crowd that averages 60 years young. The stage where
the magic happens is about three feet off the ground at the
front of the bar, and there’s an open (yet similarly dark)
room off the bar for dancing when a particular song tickles
your fancy.
^top
Best
Online Music Resource
BUMrock
bumrock.com
BUMrock has inched past its competitors with its steadfast
desire to inform its public of all things musical. It lists
live shows, maintains band bios and even hosts events. It
also offers videos, local music news and loads of links.
^top
Best
Apartment Serving as an Art Gallery and Performance Space
Miss Mary’s Art Space
5 New Scotland Ave., Albany
This new little art/performance space has an eclectic mix
of both, with something going on nearly every night. Legendary
improv psychedelic-jam artist Charalambides played the space
a while back—and that’s pretty damn cool. Kitty Little, Lincoln
Money Shot, Stars of Rock, Jason Martin and many others play
there often as well, so chances are something good is a-happenin’
at any time.
^top
Best
Radio Band
The Wait
Nobody sounds as good on the radio—or gets played as often—as
the Wait. “Hollywood” sounds so damn good coming out of our
cars’ consoles that we consider it only a matter of time before
the rest of the country catches up with us and makes the Wait
the full-on radio staple that they deserve so much to be.
^top
Best
Jazz Ensemble
Adrian Cohen Quartet
No contest: Cohen and crew have got the songs, the chops and
a devoted following. If you like jazz, you’ll love the Adrian
Cohen Quartet. And if you don’t like jazz, you’ll still love
the Adrian Cohen Quartet.
^top
Best
Latin Band
Alex Torres y los Reyes Latinos
The untimely passing of baritone saxman Nick Brignola this
year eliminated one of our annual “sure thing” critical choices—but
we’re figuring Alex Torres and his Latin Kings are poised
to fill in the breach, dominating their genre just as completely
as Brignola dominated his.
^top
Best
New Band
Black Inc.
If the prospect of hearing three former Clay People (who can
claim even earlier roots in 1000 Young, Subduing Mara and
the Vodkasonics), multitalented stringman George Muscatello
and the long-retired singer of early ’90s metal faves East
Wall doesn’t intrigue and excite you, then you’re not really
paying enough attention to local music.
^top
Best
Metal Band
EN~DoR~PhiN
This challenging trio offer a fresh and effective take on
a genre that’s been suffering from a lack of originality around
here for longer than we care to admit. We’re glad they survived
the theft of their equipment and the loss of their guitarist
to emerge tighter and more powerful than ever before.
^top
Best
Electronic Artist
Sara Ayers
After a long absence from the local concert stage, Ayers has
begun supplementing her always interesting studio work with
a series of live performances that show just how effective
and evocative electronic music can be when it’s done right.
^top
Best
Singer-Songwriter (Male)
Rob Skane
Simply put, Rob Skane writes great songs, and he sings ’em
likes he means ’em. What more do you want? That is, besides
his great new album and the fact that he also doubles as lead
guitarist and musical director for the Lawn Sausages. That’s
certainly more than enough, isn’t it?
^top
 |
| Return
of the tripple threat.
Photo byJoe Putrock |
Best
Singer-Songwriter (Female)
Katie Haverly
Katie Haverly is blessed with copious talent as a vocalist,
guitarist and songwriter, and we are lucky that she’s willing
to bless us with the same on a regular basis, seeing as how
she’s back in Albany after stints in Colorado, Arizona and
Chicago. Their loss. Our gain.
^top
Best
Guitarist
Mike Guzzardi (Black Inc.)
What a treat it’s been to watch Mike Guzzardi grow over the
past decade into one of the area’s most accomplished stringbenders.
A great natural player who puts tremendous effort into expanding
his palette and making whatever band he’s playing with sound
absolutely top-of-the-heap tight while still slipping in the
naggingly delicious slides and leads that define his work—often
while you’re looking someplace else. We like that.
^top
Best
Drummer
Thom Hall
(Small Axe)
John Bonham’s been dead for a
quarter-century, but if you want to hear someone play a monster
kit with a monstrous sound approaching Bonzo’s, look no further
than Small Axe’s Thom Hall, who provides the thunderous wallop
needed to support Jimbo Burton and D.J. Hall’s orgies of sound.
If you’ve heard Small Axe live, you know that that’s a helluva
lotta support, indeed.
^top
Best
Bassist
Nate Giordano (Wetwerks)
Nate Giordano is the bomb that makes Wetwerks explode, providing
the rumbling über-rhythms that drive their material far into
new dimensions of space and sound. He’s also one of those
rare beasts, a technically adept and intuitive bassist who
can play as hard as his band needs him to without ever overshadowing
his bandmates and their songs. When you notice him, it’s for
all the right reasons.
^top
Best
Keyboardist
Ryan Barnum
(The Wait)
We love Ryan Barnum, who provides all the cool keyboard fills
that move the Wait’s songs so far beyond the work of so many
like-minded bands. A great player with a great collection
of vintage gear (all of which he uses effectively, not just
as gimmickry), Barnum also wins utility infielder points for
providing the occasional third axe and sweet backing vocals
that make us say, “Mmmmmm.”
^top
Best
Flautist
Andrew Tisbert (Attic of Love)
We know, as soon as we say “flautist,” visions of Ian Anderson
singing “Cross-Eyed Mary” pop into your head. But there are
other things that can be done with a flute in a rock &
roll setting, and Attic of Love’s Andrew Tisbert does many
of them very, very well. The coolest thing, though, is that
instead of doing them atop aspirated-sounding, folkified Brit-rock,
he does them in front of an ass-kicking, Tool-flavored modern
metal band. Gotta see it to believe it.
^top
Best
Pop Band
The Day Jobs
With a stable of catchy songs and waves of energy, the Day
Jobs probably fit the “pop” bill better than any other band
around here. We’ve seen more than one headlining band bow
in reverence after the Day Jobs pull off a smoking opening
set. With the recent return of former-Bloom, former-Lughead
member Mike Pauley on bass, this trio will only get better.
^top
Best
Acoustic Performer
Chris
Blackwell
He’s not well known around here, but local singer-songwriter
Chris Blackwell is a genuine hillbilly-country talent. He’s
got an appealing warble and spirited redneck charm, whether
he’s performing his own first-rate songs or reverent covers
of honky-tonk and bluegrass staples. Better still, he inspires
bar patrons to get up off their duffs and boogie. We hear
he moonlights in a jam band from time to time, but hey, who’s
perfect?
^top
Best
Bad Band Name
Balls Deep
At first we thought this band name was a crude sexual reference.
Then we heard it had something to do with the male experience
of wading waist-deep into frigid water. Either way, each time
we see this band’s name plastered across fliers and stickers
in downtown Saratoga Springs, we cringe and think it’s a pretty
godawful name to be saddled with.
^top
Best
Tom Burre Vehicle
BoneOil
Not to slag any of the many side projects, support slots and
surprise pickup gigs that Tom Burre takes on, but his own
outfit, BoneOil, is still our favorite way to catch him doing
his thing. BoneOil is the perfect answer to settle that age-old
riddle, “What would happen if David Torn and Antonio Carlos
Jobim went two out of three falls to see who got to program
the iPod?”
^top
Best
Hard Rock
Secretguy
Big Al, of metal-ska mavens Can’t Say, went into the darkest
parts of the woods on a vision quest. He came back minus one
adjective (he now goes by “Albie”) and one horn section, but
he’s up one burlap-sackful of wallop in the form of Secretguy,
a monstrous blend of stoner rock, hayseed rave-up and backwoods
witchery that’d have Robert Bly making the sign of the Beast
and shotgunning Piel’s.
^top
Best
Songwriter
(Grad School)
Ed Gorch
Knotworking’s Ed Gorch writes literate and lyrical songs that
can be considered a kind of Northeastern gothic. He’s got
a way with metaphors such that you lose sight of the device
and get hit square in the face with the melancholy—but that
doesn’t mean the craft ain’t there. Shambling edifices betray
the sorry state of their occupants’ emotional states; the
natural wonder of the night sky is washed away in unflattering,
earthly incandescence; tawdry lawn ornaments stand as sorry
sentries guarding against patient indignity . . . all to poignant
melodies that will have even the strictest thesis adviser
toe-tapping.
^top
Best
Songwriter
(Vocational School)
Steve Gaylord
You work like a dog to put the KFC on the table, ’cause Rent-a-Center
don’t trade on good looks alone. It’s an ugly world, and what
you see is just the presentable face of an even deeper, ages-old
ugliness that goes way back before we got the natives drunk
and scared enough to take the shittiest of all possible real-estate
deals. So you keep your head down and your nose to the grindstone
till it buffs your features flat and you’re left with no mouth
but a slit fit for fast food in and little sense out. Every
now and then, though, something deep inside wrenches free
of its malt liquor-and-Olestra bed, seeps up your windpipe,
oozes round your clenched cuspids, and frightens the women
and the children half to death. If you’ve ever heard a Steve
Gaylord song—either with his now-defunct band Beef or with
his latest venture, the Wasted—you know exactly what we mean.
It’s like a paranoid schizophrenic’s public reading of Howard
Zinn’s The People’s History of the United States.
^top
 |
Best
Songwriter (Home School)
Gaven Richard
Gaven Richard, whom you probably know best as drummer-vocalist
for the Kamikaze Hearts, saves some of his, shall we say,
less mainstream material for solo |